"Firstborns bask in their parents' presence, which may explain why they sometimes act like mini-adults. Firstborns are diligent and want to be the best at everything they do. They excel at winning the hearts of their elders". SOURCE.
This SO describes my boy. Granted he is the offspring of two people who like to do things perfectly as well. BUT my boy worries on it. He stresses over having his routines and his ways of doing things just so.
Sometimes he makes us smile as he can be quite particular in the managing of his toys and games, and in the placement of items in the house. It makes him very useful at the FoodBank on Wednesdays as he knows where things should go and once he knows how to do something you know it will be done just so. Useful trait that.
BUT it makes it hard to help a boy learn to do something new. Then the concern and worry can be a problem and if overwhelmed this lovely nine year old will literally shut down. Too much too fast and he just won't do it.
I learn that I can give him one page with 12 questions on it and expect him to bargain about what to do.. and settle for the 10 that i actually want him to do.
I can give him a program like GPA Math and watch him soar as he can skip over what he knows, and go slowly with what is new...and it is such an encouraging program that it fits for him. BUT another on-line math program we are currently reviewing, we have to slow right down and take it in bite-sized steps or it suddenly becomes too much and we have an upset boy. And then nothing gets learned until he chills out. What makes the difference? I don't always know, he'll find something that sets with him wrong and then it just goes downhill.
He is getting better he is. Our homeschooling days are improving all the time. He's learning to walk away, He's learning to just talk to me, and on those days that it is all just too much we slow it down and do things like science and practical learning skills like cooking, cleaning, building, helping and what not. It all comes with time and we've learned to just set back and enjoy the journey. To see how perfectionism and desire to be right are NOT bad things, that as an adult he'll stand by his convictions and not be swayed. How he will not want to waste time and will take the time to just think through the problem at hand until he knows how to do it right the first time. False starts are not for this boy and having to redo things is a bust. Efficiency is where it is at. :)
But there are days... when yes... it's hard. When a person has had one melt down too many because one chose the wrong words to describe what needs to be done and misunderstandings occurred. But persevere we will and love the people God has made us be.
What struggles do you have in your homeschooling day?
How do you back up even if you don't always want to, so you can walk at a pace best for YOUR student?